Paddy and Mick

[Saintly Fish]

Paddy and Mick are working at the local sawmill.
One day, Mick slips and his arm gets caught and severed by the big bench saw
Paddy quickly puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick to the
local hospital.
Next day, Paddy goes to the hospital and asks after Mick.  The nurse says,
Oh he's out in Rehab exercising'.
Paddy couldn't believe it, but here's Mick out the back exercising his now
re-attached arm.
The very next day he's back at work in the saw mill.

A couple of days go by, and then Mick slips and severs his leg on another
bloody big saw.
So Paddy puts the limb in a plastic bag and rushes it and Mick off to
hospital.
Next day he calls in to see him and asks the nurse how he is. The nurse
replies, 'He's out in the Rehab again exercising'.
And sure enough, here's Mick out there doing some serious work on the
treadmill. And very soon Mick comes back to work.

But, as usual, within a couple of days he has another accident and severs
his head.
Wearily Paddy puts the head in a plastic bag and transports it and Mick to
hospital.
Next day he goes in and asks the nurse how Mick is. The nurse breaks down
and cries and says, 'He's dead.'
Paddy is shocked, but not surprised. 'I suppose the saw finally did him in.'
'No', says the nurse.
'Some dopey bastard put his head in a plastic bag and he suffocated'.

[Andy135]

Ok, I admit it.... that one did actually make me chuckle 🤣

 

[Geoff]

24 minutes ago, Andy135 said:

Ok, I admit it.... that one did actually make me chuckle 🤣

 

Chuckle?  I nearly wet myself. Best joke I've seen on here yet and well worth my 10/10. Geoff.☺️

Edited February 8, 2021 by Geoff

[Saintly Fish]

3 minutes ago, Geoff said:

Chuckle?  I nearly wet myself. Best joke I've seen on here yet and well worth my 10/10. Geoff.☺️

WOW....... I say no more. 

[Geoff]

I guess it's an age thing Neil. Geoff.

[Geoff]

I suspect that jokes like that are sponsored by "Tena" for men. Geoff.

[Andy135]

43 minutes ago, Geoff said:

Chuckle?  I nearly wet myself. Best joke I've seen on here yet and well worth my 10/10. Geoff.☺️

In response to your Covid post, perhaps over-generosity could be a side-effect??

[Saintly Fish]

7 minutes ago, Andy135 said:

In response to your Covid post, perhaps over-generosity could be a side-effect??

Geoff just appreciates good old fashioned humour. 

[Andy135]

3 minutes ago, Saintly Fish said:

Geoff just appreciates good old fashioned humour. 

It was funny, but not 10/10 funny. And besides, a full 10 should never be awarded on principle because that implies the perfect joke and as we all know, there's no such thing.

[Saintly Fish]

11 minutes ago, Andy135 said:

It was funny, but not 10/10 funny. And besides, a full 10 should never be awarded on principle because that implies the perfect joke and as we all know, there's no such thing.

Oh don’t be a humour nerd too ffs. I unveiled the perfect joke, just admit it. 

[Andy135]

1 hour ago, Saintly Fish said:

Oh don’t be a humour nerd too ffs. I unveiled the perfect joke, just admit it. 

It can't be the perfect joke, otherwise we'd all laugh ourselves to death. And the fact that no-one's died rather proves my point.

[Andy135]

13 minutes ago, JonC said:

Ernest scribbler? 

I had to look that up. Hadn't heard of him before, but yes, you clearly get my point 🤣👍

[Andy135]

6 minutes ago, JonC said:

You’re a bit young to appreciate Python 

I haven't seen much of their Flying Circus, but seen all their movies, which are as close to comedy perfection as possible without killing anyone.

[Andy135]

17 minutes ago, JonC said:

Not as close as Fisty’s joke. 
I should read it really but after all the hype I don’t want to be disappointed. 

TBF it's @Geoff that hyped it up. I'm just injecting some realism into the thread.

[Geoff]

During these troubled times I think that anything that makes us smile,chuckle, laugh out loud or even wet ourselves is excellent therapy. I knew that my 10/10 score would be contentious, but at least it has triggered some response at a time when the site is a bit on the quiet side. Keep em coming Neil. Geoff.

[Geoff]

3 hours ago, JonC said:

A great joke, but I thought that you were the minister for the prevention of thread hi- jacking Jon. Still well  worth an eight though. It may have had a nine if posted in it's own thread! Geoff.