Popular Post Odyssey Posted December 14, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted December 14, 2023 This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Sometime later she heard her husband wake with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood-curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture, she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, “Honey you were right… all these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you.” “What do you mean?” asked his wife. “Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in…….............…..” Maverick, MegaByte, Geoff and 2 others 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captin slows old outlaw Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 i like that 10 out of 10 Geoff and daio web 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saintly Fish Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 @Odyssey, Leo's exact reaction was ..... " is that the joke? That's not even funny, you need to tell Luke he's not funny"!! Sorry 2/10. Andy135 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoff Posted December 14, 2023 Share Posted December 14, 2023 10/10 agreed, perhaps his recent marriage has something to do with that - well it can't be one of Luke's own jokes, can it? Geoff.😉 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy135 Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 Leo explained the gist of this to me last night on CoD. I have to say I didn't really understand it then, so I was hopeful it'd make more sense after a read through this morning. Nope, still not funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captin slows old outlaw Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 3 hours ago, Andy135 said: Leo explained the gist of this to me last night on CoD. I have to say I didn't really understand it then, so I was hopeful it'd make more sense after a read through this morning. Nope, still not funny. never mind . you will have to tell a joke and make us all larf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy135 Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 18 minutes ago, captin slows old outlaw said: never mind . you will have to tell a joke and make us all larf You lot laugh at me without needing any jokes Pete... Saintly Fish 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captin slows old outlaw Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 7 hours ago, Andy135 said: You lot laugh at me without needing any jokes Pete... come on you must know one at least Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Odyssey Posted December 17, 2023 Author Share Posted December 17, 2023 7 hours ago, captin slows old outlaw said: never mind . you will have to tell a joke and make us all larf Good point…. When was the last time @Andy135 or @Saintly Fish posted a joke 🤔 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captin slows old outlaw Posted December 17, 2023 Share Posted December 17, 2023 3 minutes ago, Odyssey said: Good point…. When was the last time @Andy135 or @Saintly Fish posted a joke 🤔 oh give them a chance , wooring and having siblings is very hard on pearents. with andy i exspect that he whont have time with all thoes exmas partys , going on. sainty fish, will have all thoese football games to go to, plus the school shows ect so i would give them a bit of leaway , or ?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saintly Fish Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 19 hours ago, Odyssey said: Good point…. When was the last time @Andy135 or @Saintly Fish posted a joke 🤔 Here you go then... captin slows old outlaw, Andy135 and Geoff 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy135 Posted December 18, 2023 Share Posted December 18, 2023 19 hours ago, Odyssey said: Good point…. When was the last time @Andy135 or @Saintly Fish posted a joke 🤔 Last time I posted a joke you ripped it off! 😱 daio web 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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